“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.” — Proverbs 3:5–6 (NIV)
I am currently living in the in-between.
You know that place, right?
The place where you’ve prayed, but you don’t have the answer yet. Where there are decisions that need to be made, things that need to fall into place, timelines that seem to depend on other timelines, and about seventeen different tabs open in your brain at the same time.
That’s where I am.
I’m waiting. I’m juggling. I’m praying. I’m trying to plan ahead while simultaneously realizing that I really can’t plan ahead because there are still pieces I don’t have yet.
And if you know me, you know waiting is not exactly one of my spiritual gifts.
I like plans. I like answers. I like knowing what’s happening, when it’s happening, how it’s happening, and preferably having a backup plan for the plan.
But lately, I feel like God keeps whispering the same thing to my heart:
Trust Me.
Not figure it all out.
Not make everything happen.
Not run ten steps ahead trying to prepare for every possible outcome.
Just trust Me.
Sometimes waiting on God isn’t just waiting for one thing. One answer affects another decision. That decision affects something else. And before you know it, you’re standing there thinking, Lord, I need You to move this piece so I can figure out that piece, because that piece determines the next five pieces!
That is exactly where I find myself right now.
And I think sometimes God allows us to reach that place because it exposes how desperately we want control.
We call it planning. We call it being responsible. We call it preparing. And sometimes it absolutely is.
But sometimes underneath all that planning is fear.
What if this doesn’t work out? What if I make the wrong decision? What if the timing doesn’t come together? What if the door closes? What if I misunderstood God?
And then Proverbs 3:5–6 comes along and gently confronts all of it:
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding…”
There it is.
Lean not on your own understanding.
There will be seasons when what God is doing simply will not make sense from where I’m standing.
And I still have to trust Him.
I think sometimes I want God to hand me the entire itinerary.
“Okay Lord, show me what happens next. Then tell me what happens after that. And while You’re at it, can You tell me how everything turns out so I can stop worrying?”
But that isn’t really faith, is it?
Faith says, I don’t know what happens next, but I know Who does.
God sees what I cannot see. He knows what conversations are happening that I’m not part of. He knows which doors need to open and which ones need to stay shut. He knows what needs to happen first, what needs to wait, what needs to change, and what He may actually be protecting me from.
I see one little piece.
God sees the whole picture.
Isaiah 55:8–9 says, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”
Maybe the thing that feels delayed to me is perfectly timed by Him.
Maybe what feels like nothing happening is actually God arranging things I cannot see.
Maybe this waiting isn’t an interruption to the plan.
Maybe the waiting is part of the plan.
And this is what God has really been working into my heart lately:
Can I trust Him before I know how it turns out?
It’s easy to say, “God is faithful!” when the prayer has been answered. It’s easy to praise Him when the door opens. It’s easy to look backward and say, “Ohhhh, now I see what You were doing!”
But what about when I can’t see it yet?
Can I still say He is good?
Can I still say He is faithful?
Can I still believe He is providing?
Can I still have peace when there are unanswered questions waiting for me tomorrow?
I want my answer to be yes.
Not because I suddenly became amazing at waiting. Trust me, I have not.
But because I have history with God.
I have walked with Jesus long enough to look back over my life and see His fingerprints everywhere.
There were things I once cried over that I now thank Him for. There were doors I desperately wanted Him to open that I now understand needed to stay closed. There were seasons when I couldn’t see a way forward, and somehow He made one.
There were needs I didn’t know how He would meet.
He met them.
There were times I thought everything was falling apart.
It wasn’t.
God was still writing the story.
And He still is.
So here I am.
I still have questions. I still have things I’m waiting for. I still have decisions hanging in the balance. I still have moments when my brain starts running ahead and trying to solve problems God hasn’t even asked me to solve yet.
But I also have peace.
Not because everything has been settled.
Because I am learning to settle my heart in Him.
There’s a difference.
Psalm 37:5 says, “Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this.”
So that’s what I’m choosing to do.
Lord, I commit my plans to You.
My timeline. My expectations. The doors I desperately want opened. The answers I’m still waiting for. The things I can control and especially the things I cannot.
If the answer is yes, I will trust You.
If the answer is no, I will trust You.
If the answer is not yet, I will trust You there too.
Because after all these years of walking with Jesus, one thing I know for sure is this:
God has never needed my help being God.
He doesn’t need me to force the door. He doesn’t need me to manipulate the timing. He doesn’t need me to figure out every detail before He can move.
He simply asks me to follow Him.
So today, while I’m still in the in-between, I’m choosing trust.
I don’t know exactly what comes next.
But I know Who goes before me.
And for today, that is enough.
The waiting may be uncertain, but the One I’m waiting with is not.
“Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.” — Psalm 27:14 (NIV)